Thursday, February 18, 2010

Growing Up

I have a love/hate relationship with the fact that my kids are growing up.

On the one hand I love that they are getting more independent. I see the joy when they master something new and I get so excited for them. I love that I don't have to do quite so much for them. I love seeing them make good decisions.

On the other hand I hate that they don't need me quite as much as they used to. I hate that they can do things for themselves and don't have to ask for help. I hate seeing them make bad decisions. (The latter is not usually the case. I have very good kids.)

Practically from the day my kids are born I sing to them at bedtime. Every night. That is the one thing that is never missed. They get to pick the song and it is usually a silly song that makes us laugh.

The other night when I asked Cruz what song he wanted he said he didn't want one. This has NEVER happened. Not once. A little shocked by his answer I asked if he was sure. He said he was. I asked why he didn't want a song and he just shrugged his shoulders. I was a little confused for a moment and then understanding dawned. He was too old. I asked if he was too old for a bedtime song. He gave a proud little smile and nodded his head. Two things happened at once; I felt such joy seeing him feel a little more grown-up and a little more indepenent, and my heart broke just a little. How many other things that we do all the time, that I take for granted, will he soon be too old to do?

My kids are growing up and I hate love am dealing with it.

6 comments:

Katie Lane said...

oh sad day! good thing you have Koen to still love and sing to!

Karl Schempp said...

If it makes you feel any better, Cruz slept with his Blue PowerRanger last night! :)

Anna Lankford said...

Okay I actually cried a little tear when I read this, I totally know how you feel. They grow up so fast.

David and Jana said...

It is crazy how fast they do grow up. I wish I could capture these moments forever because I am sure going to miss them...

Karen Brothersen said...

That was a very sweet post! Make me think!

Ben and Heidi said...

It is always so hard but good to see your kids grow up and get older and bigger!